I am disgusted

Can't a girl have a normal e-conversation nowadays, without being constantly chatted up by despies? Ever since getting Skype, I have been fending off dumb, can't-type-worth-beans weirdos telling me I'm pretty and they want to hear my voice or meet me and have a drink together or some other such rot. Honestly, can't they just find girls the normal way? I'm still trying to find polite ways to shoot down prospective "loverboys". I thought it would be cool to meet people from other countries or something, but I'm certainly not looking for "love". What kind of relationship would that be anyway? And do people really fall for that? Oy vey. All I wanted was to talk to my family more conveniently. I still really like the program, but honestly. Some people have NO lives.

So, anyway. LaFawnduh, eh? I really don't think it ever works like that.

One other thing.

Those of you unfortunate enough to read this without foreknowledge of its purpose, without brotherhood unity to the other members ascribed here, and without realization of what shall befall you now, I must explicate a very simple point.

I *bows* have been honored to be graced by a title so astounding, so amazing, so magnificant - there is no point in denying that it fully describes all of my faculties, my talents or 'skills'[as Napolean would so properly state], and my inner qualities which make me especially wonderful and overtly sexy on all fridays and sometimes off wednesdays too!

This title is completely shocking. Try to brace yourself.

It will reveal itself to you.

...very soon.

...

...*sigh*

I'm such a nice biscuit. Be proud of me :0(( pleeeaaase.

-RK

Ooh ooh ooh!

You will not believe where I am sitting.
Nor will you believe what I am doing where I am sitting.
Nor will you believe what is working so I can be doing what I'm doing where I'm sitting.

No more cryptics? Fine. Fine. Fine.

I am sitting in my ROOM.
I am on the INTERNET.
And the network is WORKING.

I know. I know. It's amazing.

It's inconcievable. It's unbelievable. It's impossible.

And really, it is amazing.

I know.

We are proud. We are pleased.

We are on the world wide web.

And we are at last, satiated.

Be overly and expressively joyous.

Now.

Oh yeah. And, I almost forgot...

***

To Widge:

You may have foiled me with a longer title but

a) Mine was so much smoother.
And 2) I totally beat you for most-broken-up post that still looks totally and absolutley

AMAZING!

Not to mention fully succinct and elegant.

So thar!

***

-RK

A post as written by Widge, in an attempt to further describe his trapesing about in the city of Paris and other such going-ons

...although my comment left on the doorstep of Rali's long titled post should be enough for my own contribution to this...joint...blog of ours (thank you, thank you, I try), I decided that I had enough time and was in a near enough mood to be able to make something more...lasting, more real.
As if zeros and ones in one form are more real than in another, but that's not even beside the point, it's...it's...far from it! (wow, I'm just on a roll today)
OK, where am I going with this?
Oh right, Paris, hopefully it won't weigh over 70lbs or I won't be able to bring it home!
As for Paris, it is nice.
So descriptive, neh?
We've seen the sights, seen the unseeable, and seen some pretty remarkable things too.
But rather than attempt to describe such things with oh so boring words I will instead force you all to wait until I return at grace you all with gifts and merryment and pictures.
Oh, and speaking of pictures, I managed to procure a laptop while on my break and will thus be bring *all* my pictures, spoken so highly of.
You will finally be able to put faces to names!
Doesn't that just make you leap for joy?
Leap dammit!!
Well, I must stop this as we have decided to not even give the price a second glance and order ice-cream fondue.
Au revoir!

Wow, is it really almost...

The countdown to the return has begun!

Just two more days until I will be on the plane flying back to the rest of my life. No more weird limbo. No more vacationing at home. No more sleeping until 2 pm and being a completely useless sack of genes in the proverbial gene pool. Nope. No more.

Time to return to the ensomnia, the manic glazing through books on topics I could hardly be said to really and truly care less about, and the loads and loads of ....dare I say it....fat ass chocolate!

That's right Avi. We are going to the store. And we are buying an entire stock of new, fresh fat ass chocolate!

Prepare to submit!

Oh, and we will have many more tea parties and many more late nights over only Heaven knows what...

Sigh. And more all-nighters multiple times in a week, I'm sure.

Won't it be GREAT!?

=0[ I'm so sure...

Add this to the Hall of smkr-ishness...

Oh my Gosh I'm so ashamed of myself... Friday I was telling Dad about The Smoke Zone and why we called ourselves smokers (smkrs) and I called The Smoke Zone a "joint blog" and he cracked up and it took me (I kid you not) a whole minute to realize I'd made a brilliant pun! Which means of course it wasn't brilliant because I didn't even notice I'd done it. And in the presence of my Dad, too! (He is the master of punmanship.) How shameful.

So that was just something sad and pathetic for you to laugh at. I do love the idea of it being a "joint blog for smokers", though. So glad Dad noticed.

Some gibberish made up just to make me sound more important than I really ought to be considered

If that isn't the longest title on this blog, you can smack me and call me Bucky!

But only once. Because as soon as the other smkrs read this, I am no less certain that they will each and all come up with completely ridiculously long titles just to prove their point than I am certain the sky is still blue, the grass still not hot pink, and cows still not flying around with moose antlers.

So anyway. Enough of that. It's time for twenty questions.

...Okay, no not really. I was just wondering if you would turn scarlet or puce and begin storming around the room you are currently sitting in, in complete frustration and full of bitter angst. I'm sure it really didn't work. The suspense was not nearly high enough, nor the topic really annoying enough.

But fear not! I have better plans, more complex schemes, and more detailed concepts that you will never - I say, never see coming.

So. In other news: I finally finished the first book on my reading list of the break, Year Five: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Quietly and patiently awaiting my paperback cover of The Half-Blood Prince [Note here: it is not 'prints', as was previously thought - even though I would consider that to be much more clever title.] to arrive on store shelves. Meanwhile, launching myself headlong into Mitch Albom's The Five People You Meet in Heaven, which is already a witty and thought provoking little book.

I've found several great quotable lines littered throughout its pages. Here are a few quick examples to set your mind a whirl before the start of term:

All endings are beginnings. We just don't know it at the time.

People didn't go to ocean piers much anymore; they went to theme parks where you paid $75 a ticket and had your photo taken with a giant furry creature.

No story sits by itself.

As far as he could tell, when your time came, it came, and that was that. You might say something smart on your way out, but you might just as easily say something stupid.

The running boy is inside every man, no matter how old he gets.

That is what heaven is for. For understanding your life on earth.

When you are an outcast, even a tossed stone can be cherished.

Fairness does not govern life and death.

Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know.

And one of my personal favorites thus far: No life is a waste. The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone.

-RK

The Smoker Hall of Fame

I suggest that we start a smoker hall of fame for stupid choses, comments, etc that do not have serious reprocussions. And to start us off I have an entry to be considered.
For various reasons explained in my personal blog I found my self with a snowboard that I couldn't ride with a ways down to the bottom of the slope. So to speed my downward process I decided to take a "short cut" down a slope that wasn't groomed for skiing. To top this off I decide to use the snowboard, which I can't control, as a sled. While the first bit was fun I los the snowboard and had to climb 12 ft up a 55% degree angle slope of 2-3 ft of unpacked powder, not fun. I took it easy the rest of the way down but ended up losing my camera and Rachelle's on the way down. Having no idea where I had lost them I decided the best plan of action was to get to get my skis back and take that slope in a way I had a little more control. I headed up the lift without my hat for some reason and my hair was frozen stiff by the time I got to the top. To add insult to injury it was almost white out at the top so I had to rethinki my plan of going down the powder in skis. So I now decided to got to where I came out of the powder and climb back up. This took me a good half an hour but I am happy to say I did find the goggles and camera and am left with only a sore bum and headache. Well on to Paris, see you guy soon

This one's for you, Avi:

Rali spins tunes as DJ Smoking Monkey Get your dj name @ Quiz Me

***

Need I say any more?

I think not.

-RK

So Sore

Hi all. As you guys prepare for the quickly approaching trip back to Newbold I am doing my best to survive three days of icy skiing. I am cheered by the mere thought of skiing for three days straight but my sore muscles groan and chastise me after only a single day. You will be glad to hear that my mad cooking skills came in handy Sunday night when trying to make supper on minimal supplies.
I had brought chicken boulion, instant mashed potatoes, rice, baby edam, satsumas and mint tea with me. This was a good thing as I arrived Saturday and Rachelle and I were unable to do any further shopping until Monday.
Back to Sunday night. Low on supplies, as previously mentioned, I decided to make mashed potatoe soup. (For those of you paying close attention you have already realized that mashed potatoe soup does not actually exist and it is code for winging it) I quickly set to work cooking the rice in a chicken broth (from the boulion) and making the mashed potatoes in a second pot. Whilst I was busy with my task Rachelle was grating some of the baby edam. Upon completion of the mashed potatoes the chicken broth and rice was added to bring it to a soupy texture and cooked down to the apropriate thickness for soup. As our hungry stomachs growled we quickly ladled it into bowls and added the freshly grated edam which quickly melted from the heat of the soup. It may have simply been our hunger but I like to think it was my cooking genous that made us agree that this was a damn good meal.
The End

Home is where the...

Well, I don't know about the rest of you - but I'm ready to go back to the good ol' UK. Not that being home is a bad thing, but I'd like to resume my life and just finish out school, eh?

I s'pose a large part of it is just the fact that I can't take being in this weird-ish sort of 'limbo' much longer. It's like I don't live there, I don't live here...

[insert angst] Sigh.

Really, it would be good if life could be normal again. I realize that can't happen for a long time...maybe even never - but some form of normalcy would be much appreciated.

Maybe that's why I'm ready to step back into the grueling pain which is school. Even though it is painful, even frustrating and excrutiating, at least it feels normal.

Oh, and I must note the irony of the fact that I am posting in UK time at home becasue often I end up posting in home time in the UK. Strange.

-RK

It's almost over

I'm downstairs in my grandmother's house in Massachusets.
I can feel my break slowly fading away.
I'll soon be in Paris, which I won't be able to enjoy, it's too close to having to go back to school.
I don't want to go back, I want to stay here and go to a community college and join my friend's band.
Ah well, one semester isn't that long, eh?
Anyway, it won't be long now 'til we are all back together.
But will that stop me from posting on this group chat that we are trying to pass off as a blog?
Hell no.

Where'd everyone go?

No one has been online, no one has responded to e-mails, posts, comments. Am I alone in the world? Don't tell me all of the other smokers have been taken out (gasp) I guess my comment to Becca's last post was more prophetic than I realized (tears well up) Well, fine, if thats how you guys want it I won't use the free internet I have all week.

Quick word...

You will notice that the page is a whole lot shorter than before.

This is due to the fact that I have updated the page to show only two days. That's right! Just two (2) days!

This means that you will have to stop being a bum and check this blog at least once every two (2) days if you don't want to miss any posts.

If you choose to still be a bum and only check the new messages say every week, or every ten (10) days, you will only be forcing yourself to go hunting and bumbling through the archives in hopes to uncover all of the messages.

My suggestion: just don't be a bum and check new messages every two (2) days. Not difficult. And, it looks a lot nicer since some people haven't sent me adequate links to fill the sidebar with. Once that extends, the number of posts may.

But really, just pay attention to new updates =0D

-RK, your friendly dictator

Widge, this is your fault!

Count this as revenge for your text!

Well since everyone else is acting all funkified and weirded out, I figured I'd better jump on the bandwagon before it came and ran me over headlong. So here it is - a post of nothing.

That's right - absolutely and utterly nothing.

Enjoy it while you can. It may not hold....I may feel profundity coming upon me at any...

What is the meaning of life? Is there an end goal to what we call pursuit of happiness? Is there any....

...No, must fight it! Cannot talk about anything! Must struggle harder against the will to say something reasonable....Must fight harder!....Cannot give....

The universe is ever expanding, or ever imploding, and I find that oft times I must ask myself...

...NO! Can....not...do...it....must....hold....out....long....

If there is a loving god in this world, how is it that he/she can stand to see....

...working....so....hard to remain.....pointless.....must not....address......real....issue.....

Sometimes, I wonder if I am just seeking for something in this world that I can never find. I wonder, far too often I feel, if I am just a lost seeker in a world full of....

....must assume....stance of.....nonesense.....cannot be.....logical....must fight off.....demons of.....rationality.....must be.....aimless....cannot fight......any....longer...must give....in....to......

The idea that there is some better good, some greater goal sometimes make me re-evaluate the ways in which I treat others that I come in contact with. Now whether daily or simply a random meeting of a stranger....

...Oh Heavens! That's it! I can't do it, y'all. I just can't assume the same pointlessness that must be a sort of talent within yourselves. I am proud of my random little buddies....but as you can see...

I am just a failure. I just can't.

Sigh. And such a pity too. I could have made such beautiful random babble. Such lovely nonesense that all the world would have upheld it as the most wonderful thing in this generation.

But sadly, I am incapable of being pointless. You must forgive me.

-RK

*Grins maniacally and sprouts antennae*

YOINK!

Ah, the profundity of me!

I wanted to use the verb "sprout" in a sentence up there. I like that sentence. It is a good sentence. Ok, maybe not a good one but that doesn't mean I'm not an alien-I mean, er - look at the kitty!

This is me wasting time and attempting to prolong my lunch break (I can't believe I'm working! Bah!)by writing nonsense just to fill up space. That is why I have also commented on practically every post so far (also since no one commented on mine, I am attempting to guilt-trip peopl-oops, my secret is revealed! Erm, ignore this whole parenthetical statement! It never happened!)

Also also, I had very little sleep last night since I was up almost all night because the gods of drawing demanded I give myself carpal tunnel coloring one of my drawings with my sister's pencils. It looks half-good, I must color MORE! Curse the gods of drawing!

Must - hit - head - on - something -

Ok all better. Bye-bye now.

Sex

It all comes down to sex. Why does everything end with sex?
Oh, and Dan Brown is a genious.
Hi all from Munich, I love hotels with free internet. I finished the Davinci Code this afternoon, having bought it yesterday. Besides wow the only thing I can say is WHY DIDNT YOU GUYS FORCE THIS ON ME MONTHS AGO? We have been sharing books, music, ideas and yet all I had on this was that it was a good book. You guys should be ashamed. Well off to bed.

oo! Look!

Sorry, this post is nothing.
I just *had* to be the one to send our little blog into a new realm:
that of having more posts that can fit in the "previous posts" section.
I feel so proud! We actually have 11 (including this one) posts!
*sniff sniff*
*insert obvious parental joke about child leaving the nest or getting older here*
*insert clever humorous way to tie this post off*
*insert credit card*
/SPAN

a shameful attempt at posting

Well, well, you've all certainly made your mark now and taken back the blog.
I think we can agree it no longer seems like simply me and Rali's blog but really has that true...group blog feel.
Whatever that means.
Actually, I don't really have any good reason to post!
I just feel like I need to put something down or it'll seem like I'm not participating!
First, an order of business.
I'd like to make a motion that a link be added to my little section.
That of my other blog: Penny For My Thoughts.
That's http://paidpoetry.blogspot.com if you need the URL.
Well moving on, there's a new post up on my home blog about zombies and guitars and western movies. Yipee!
So is anyone else dreading going back to school for this next semester?
Oh! In other dreadful news, (I know at least Ande will appreciate this) Wigu has ended it's long running as one of the funniest and most randomly odd webcomics on the net. Mr. Rowland has finished the series. It's over. There will not be another Wigu comic.
But I think *only* Ande and me care about that one so I won't dwell on that too long.
In the meantime, lets do like t-rex and abandon verbs!
They suck!
We can awesome!
Now excuse me but I have to go happy and busy.

sick...

That's right. I'm sick.

Now I'm not talking about mentally, or emotionally even. No, no - quite physically sick. Stuffy headed, runny nosed, throbbing templed sort of sick. The kind where you want to throw yourself out a window or drown yourself in warm goodness, just in hopes that it'll eventually make you feel better.

And if it doesn't - hey, at least you won't have to be sick anymore.

No. Ghosts don't get sick.

At least, so I've heard.

And even if they do, I'm sure it feels better than being sick alive...at least you don't feel like your going to die.

Right?

But anyway. I'm sick, and I'm tired...but not sick and tired...Nope, just sick. And just tired. So I'm going to go now and hope that I feel better and hope that I get better...

...and hope that in general, life gets better.

Sigh.

Oh well, at least I can rest assured [if and when I do rest that is], that I'm still one of the smkr union; which makes me glad whichever way you swing it.

Glad to know that I 'belong' to that....that....that sort of elite group.

It makes me feel at least glad on the inside for a moment. So be glad for that...and rest while you can.

-RK

Happy News Yar!

Fellow friends and crackpots:

I wish thee all the happiest of happy new years. May all of your...erm, smkr wishes...erm....come...uhh...true.

May the year be filled with...smkr-ish....umm....things.

And may you all...uhhh....prosper in your....erm....smk...ways.

Sigh. Okay so this is harder than I thought it was going to be.

Let's just put it this way, shall we then?

Have a good year doing whatever smkry things you do and prospering in whatever smkry ways you choose -

And may you come out better the other end anyway!

-RK

Paris

Quick little bit of business. Widge, I need to know when you are going to get to Paris so I can plan my trip to Lyon. Raili, I need to know if you are coming as soon as you know. Ok, back to the fun in Amsterdam.